Here at Ice Moon Prison, we have a habit of becoming fond of foods available only in other parts of the world. When we visited eastern Canada, for instance, we were introduced to poutine and Montréal smoked meat. When we visited Iceland, we were introduced to skyr. Skyr, a kind of thick yoghurt, proved impossible to get in Australia, until late 2017 when three different brands materialized at once. We purchased all three and reviewed them side by side.
Here at Ice Moon Prison, everyone deserves a second chance. This applies equally to our vegetable scraps and grass clippings, so we have commissioned the bespoke official Ice Moon Prison Three-bin Compost System.
Here at Ice Moon Prison we are conscious of how much energy our facility uses, hence we are early adopters when it comes to LED technology. Sometimes too early. A couple of years ago Limitless LED released these inexpensive warm/cool white bulbs in the familiar B22 form factor. They ended up being relegated to the guest sleeping quarters because their light was too directional and they left parts of the room too poorly lit. We reluctantly went back to incandescent bulbs.
Then the bayonet pin on a bulb broke, rendering the bulb unsafe to use. There was only one thing for it. Teardown porn.
Here at Ice Moon Prison, going outside with insufficient clothing can be fatal. Hence we find ourselves checking the Bureau of Meteorology’s forecast often, even before we get up in the morning. Fumbling for a smartphone while still in bed is out of the question—LCD screens are off-limits in sleeping quarters—so we are experimenting with audio announcements.
Designed by Cherie Marie Leck, 2001
40-count silk gauze; Kreinik Silk Mori; Kreinik Blending Filament.
Stitched by Tina Canton
Designed by Michael Boren, 2010
18 count mono canvas; Finca #12 pearl cotton; Kreinik #8 braid, Sundance size 11 beads. “Monet” colour set.
Stitched by Tina Canton
Here at Ice Moon Prison we are always looking for new instruments of torture. The subtler and more inadvertent the better. We recently came into an inheritance that included a complete set of Robertson Drive screwdrivers. These innocent drivers have the potential in their new home to be a source of great frustration to our inmates.
Here at Ice Moon Prison we have strong opinions about what constitutes a fantasy novel. One aspect that is non-negotiable is that it has to have a map. So we were disappointed while rereading Stephen Donaldson’s Mordant’s Need that it does not ship with a map. This omission is peculiar, because clearly the author had a map while he was writing the story: there are many often quite detailed descriptions of the land’s geography. So we set ourselves the task of annotating every geographic statement in the novel.